As this month is entirely inspired by the practice of yoga, I’m going to journal my way through it, to try to make that connection between mind, body and “spirit”. Spirit is a hard one for me. Concepts of things I can do, see, or feel (emotionally) are easy for me to grasp and process, to adapt to even, but the “OM” and the “breathing out stress” ? It’s all so…. so wishy-washy, and yet, from the outside looking in it seems so peaceful. It makes me wish I could make that connection but it’s just not there for me (as of yet). Anyways, I’m not concerned about that right now. On day one of my challenge I decided to focus on “foundation”, rooting down, feeling strong, standing strong, finding the even balance in my toes, my legs, my lower back, shoulders, neck to the crown of my head. As I stood in Mountain pose and concentrated on how I felt, I just felt heavy. I felt fat, I felt the weight my body is trying to lug around and I wished it just wasn’t there. Not like I was hating myself, just much more aware of the situation. Feeling every inch of what I don’t want to carry, and imagining a life with out it. I made a mental list of things that I’m really not happy with and only things that CAN be changed, the areas where the inches CAN be lost.
Tummy, hips, arms, sideboobs (you know, where your boobs kind of sag into your armpits).
I still feel strong, I still feel focused and overall balanced, but what would it feel like without these 40lbs hanging on my body. How would running 10km feel? how will it feel to slip into my favourite pair of jeans and not have to suck in that last breath to do up the button? how will it make me feel to wear a tank top with out covering up my arms?
So, as I stand in mountain pose, I feel my foundation, I stand a little taller and a little stronger. This is my starting point and from here I move into the next step.